Life's been good to me so far

A couple of my friends who live up in Miami like to say I live in "the sticks," which I always protest, because, what? This is not the sticks! Sure, I get the occasional possum and raccoon on the deck, and yeah, we can walk past a tomato field to feed a horse some carrots, but what of that? :p Then I am actually up around Miami, and come back home, and see this as our highway exit...


Isaac (scooter), Jake (bike), and Elise (running) in our obviously not rural area ;) I'm on a bike, and you'll just have to take my word for it.


I thought it was funny, in an "of course" sort of way, when I got to Girl Scout camp a little late to pick these two up one day, and this is how they were using their time:

She was so thrilled to have people at camp (albeit more counselors than campers) who understood her excitement about the Neil Gaiman signing, and SuperCon :)

Pictures from Dance Empire's (public, widely promoted) Instagram, obviously screencapped from my phone - I had resisted Instagram successfully for so long, but then when Aaron basically started LIVING at the studio and they were posting pics all day, I had to do it. He's in both of those groups, doing ab exercises. Because DE actually takes their company dancers to the beach, since it's harder to run on sand and harder to maintain balance in the water O_o


The thrown together Peter pan costume I mentioned.

Sometimes, there's no living with this kid. Who happened to be turning 12, the day these were taken.

I actually made the entire hat for that ensemble before I realized I'd used a toddler pattern as a guide. It WAS 1 in the morning... Beary got a hat.

Jake is so touched, whenever anyone does anything FOR Beary.

Isaac, with his clarinet (that seems as big as he is, to me) and after he was done riding on Jake's shoulders.


He got pretty darn good on the recorder last year, but this is obviously next level - it's more complicated fingering patterns, harder to make the sound with the reed, and WAY heavier and harder to hold up on his thumbs.

That (Hot Cross Buns) was from yesterday, and he's already doing it more smoothly and also playing Mary Had a Little Lamb, today :D

GMYS posted this one a couple of places. Jake in black on flute near the camera, and Isaac in red down on the end, with his clarinet. They elected to quit violin and switch, this year - Elise is still playing violin.


Sorry this is awkward, it's a screencap from my facebook app, but look at them last year, in their camp shirts, on their way out the door one morning...


And this year:

The biggest difference I see, aside from how badly our mat has aged and how much less hair Jake and Elise are sporting, is in my Beasty's height - I didn't notice at first, but she's on the step in pic 1, and standing on the porch with the boys in pic 2. She's grown so much!


Best ever. Lettuce wraps and bubble tea from Stir Moon, which INCLUDING A 25% TIP is $13. So yummy.


My lovely Ananda baked a cake and made the frosting totally on her own, for the first time.

She thought it tasted "weird," but I could tell she was somewhat proud of it as she served it up to a line of eager siblings.

Photobombing, separate days.


My Elisey Beast.




Math, yesterday after dancing. You can see the progression from, "ok, multiplication review" to "WHAT'S THAT?! A CAMERA?!" pretty clearly, I think.


Ananda, sciencing (really, that's a word) in her laboratory room.

Today, it was just Jacob, Elise and I at home during the school day. Grant was up at his office, A&A were at a friend's, and Isaac was at school. We sat around the table eating snack plates* and playing with Story Cubes for awhile. I'm teaching both of them to knit, this week, which is tedious as all hell but they always seem eager to get back to. We've also been working a lot with their Starfall writing journals and tear out, fold up books. The ones the two of them have are the last of my free pack of Starfall first grade workbooks and art books from 10 years ago when Starfall was giving them out free to educators and I ordered some.

After we got Isaac from school and collectively collapsed from near heat stroke, the four of us packed a swim bag and a snack bag and set out to walk up to the Y to swim. Two blocks out, though, Ms Denise (Elise's fabulous former preschool teacher) pulled over and gave us a ride in her giant SUV, which was sweet and thrilled Elise. She lives about a block from us so we knock on her door and sell her Girl Scout cookies and she always waves when Elise is playing outside as she's passing.

Anyway, swimming was cool. It's always weird for me how any mom within 75 pounds of my weight who is there with their kids is sitting on the sidelines fully clothed. I'm in a bikini, having fun in the pool. Usually after the first few minutes and/or whenever I'm not up on the deck, people stop staring. The lifeguard was fun and uncovered the diving board and encouraged kids to get on and try it - Elise is on cloud 9 for doing it when her big brothers (although she actually calls Isaac and Jake her "little brothers" and Aaron her big brother) were afraid to. The walk back was ok, it was cloudy and near sunset so aside from swarming clouds of gnats it wasn't too summer-ish.

I'm looking forward to the weekend, even though tomorrow's kinda ridic: Ananda has Girl Scout program aid training (for summer camps) from 10-4. Aaron has hip hop from 11-12:30. They both need to be picked up from Cybele's before any of that, and in the evening all 7 of us are going (and meeting various friends**) to the derby match, where Annie's junior team will be carrying the flag and generally skating around acting like they rock.

Derby matches are usually a lot of fun. And then SUNDAY!! Bwahaha, Sunday is Mother's Day, i.e. MY DAY, i.e. I will be sleeping in late, demanding all sorts of ludicrous pampering from everyone and going out alone for prolonged dates with my husband without any sort of bs guilt.

No, I am not kidding. I bought us gift cards to Outback and the movies, and new wine glasses (they were all broken over the past several months). I was just on the phone with my sister today, comparing the gifts we got ourselves - in advance of the day, obviously :p She went with clothes and a book.


*snack plates were started by my paternal, Cuban grandfather, who always gave my sister Laura and I, along with all our (all female) cousins plates of rolled lunch meat, tomato slices, olives, pickles, sometimes cheese and usually crackers. Jake and Elise are my first children to enjoy snack plates since every other kid I have hates at least one core component.

**I met this chick at the FIU transfer orientation the other day, very boho mismatched clothes, wild hair, piercings, interesting bracelets. I walked up to her and said, "I realize you shouldn't really judge people based solely off of their appearances. But you really look like we ought to be friends." This worked out very well, and before long we were deep into each others' life histories/aspirations, and planning for her to come to the match. She's a child psych major who wants to work with deaf kids :)


( +5 pics from last Sunday afternoon, which was event-laden... )

( FB convo with my sister about Annie's eating )

( 500 million (26) pictures )

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Aaron cried throughout most of an hour long conversation we had last night about how terrible his attention span, ability to concentrate and general coping skills are. He's been acting more like an SID flibberdigibit than ever recently...the past few weeks with him have reminded me of when he was 4 and couldn't talk, or wear short sleeves, or have a mosquito bite that didn't feature a complete breakdown. We talked together about how it was when he was young and things I did that helped him and how it's been lately and how frustrated both of us are, and one thing I always really appreciate about Aaron is how free and easy we communicate and how much he absorbs and listens... There is a deep connection that helps, even if we do have to be alone together in a low-stimulation area for that to happen.

He told me he watches a YouTuber with ADD who talks about his ADD and makes Aaron really thinks he has it, and that guy has part of his segments that are about when he's off his meds and that scares Aaron, like maybe he needs meds, but he doesn't want to take pills. We researched diagnosis and treatment of ADD and med side effects a lot today, and have been talking about using this SID self-management thing for older kids, that my sister found for her son, as well as whether we want to make a trip to the pediatrician/therapist over this. I believe he's old/cognizant enough to have a say every step of the way. Something has to happen, though, because I'm really starting to worry about his inability to do very simple multi-step things and feel kind of freaked about what it means for his long term...life. Academics, home management, having relationships. He's VERY "autism spectrum" this past month, not making eye contact or even appearing to hear siblings who talk to him and putting his hands over his ears to block out lectures in this EXTREMELY involuntary way, like he knows he cannot do that but he has to...*sigh* I would not be quite so worried about what could be a temporary setback if it wasn't on the heels of a whole year that made me nervous about his overall progress. And if he wasn't so depressed and anxious about it as often as he is :/

We're going to do an experiment and see how he reacts to coffee before chores/schoolwork, after reading a lot of really interesting studies today about the benefits of self-treating / ADD with caffeine. I'm also instituting a lot more structure for him, that we're planning together this week, that involves breaks for physical activity and some of his learning coming from computer things (watching documentaries, Kahn University, websites that teach typing, stuff like that).

I also introduced the idea to him that he may just be starting puberty and experiencing mood swings and hormonal changes that seem like anxiousness, confusion, heightened stir craziness, etc. It makes a lot of sense as a possible total explanation.

Sometimes the idea that I am managing their educations, extracurricular opportunities and social lives - in such a hands on way - is really like the weight of the whole damned world on my shoulders, as they get older... This isn't preschool anymore, for Ananda and Aaron. I really have to take a step back and breathe, sometimes.

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Stress about Isaac over the past couple of months - which I outlined but left quite a lot out of, on tumblr, but you can read the C&P'd outline ( under this cut )
Anyway, Isaac stress - it has given me aaaall these sudden gray hairs, and this ridiculously tired look that is creating fine lines all over my face, and I'm suddenly looking at myself thinking, damn. You are gonna be old, and that's fine, because I can deal with being old. But FIRST, you are gonna gradually decline and just look like a crappier looking thirty something person, a really haggard young you that's starting to fade. And that is harder for me to deal with. I'm finding myself considering all sorts of things I never thought I would, from dyeing my hair to FREAKING MICRODERMABRASION. It's really sort of nuts how compelling a low cost way to just give you another couple of years of looking like your own traditional self, can be. I find myself thinking things like, "when I go get injections to take care of these spider veins on my legs" and "maybe I should get a thighs/breast lift while I'm on the table anyway because I have to have a stupid tummy tuck I don't even want, and then I can at least like myself in a bathingsuit" (even though this is bizarre "in advance" thinking, since as it stands nothing is in any way hanging but I live in fear that when I lose weight, IT WILL).

And I am losing weight. In this very private, I've hit rock bottom sort of way I'm not ready to talk about.

"Aging," though - on the one hand, I feel beautiful a lot of the time. On the other, I have this sense of myself as a bundle of ok-for-now minor flaws that, if allowed to snowball, could avalanche out of control and then I'll find myself so far gone that it's "too late", whereas if I "kept up" with everything, I'd get another good decade and a half or so in before I have to reconcile myself to major changes.

For now I'm drinking a lot of water, using serum before I go to sleep and really not having time to give too much of a damn. My actual ACHES AND PAINS are too intense for me to get carried away with aesthetics...I have a major foot problem that is escalating, from a combination of my misaligned hips and falling down some stairs two weeks ago. It's getting to the point that I'm actually sucking it up and walking around in supportive sneakers, which means It Is Serious. Making an appt about it tomorrow....I'm sort of grateful that it's all messed up because it contributed to the aforementioned Rock Bottom situation that spurred me back to real changes re: weight.

So, yeah. Grant and I have some really great moments, kisses and laying together times and him rubbing my foot or us in the bath or whatever, when we just look at each other and go, Damn. We are doing an awful lot of shit right. All the kids and I have really great moments, and I don't waste any time. I make sure to enjoy the bike ride in the good weather and to savor the feeling of falling asleep and to spend some of my car rides on the phone laughing with friends. Or crying with them. I have this idea that shit's gonna calm down at some point? But I'm not really sure when that is. I guess the soonest possible calming factors would be:

-taking a break between degrees, like after I get my AA? That's kind of being thought of as "surgery time", though, i.e., not calm. Maybe Spring Break could be a mini break? I was just taking a makeup Spanish exam in the teachers' lounge for an hour, today
-when Grant gets to start telecommuting, finds a closer job or we move north towards his current job. That would be a huge huge factor.
-when some of my kids drive
-when all my kids are grown

But at least I'm not in some gray waiting place anymore, behind my locked bedroom door, wondering how I should start. Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans and all that.

My sister thinks it's hilarious that there is now a Kindle in my bathroom where there used to be a book. In the increments that happen when I pee, I'm reading Sex at Dawn: The Prehistoric Origins of Modern Sexuality and Great Expectations.

I relate to a degree that is beyond embarrassing and into "I'm not even embarrassed, this is just awesome" to freaking Sixx AM lyrics. I have officially gone from growing up with to growing old with, Nikki Sixx. Blared all too often on my way back into town from the train station:

This is a second coming
This is a call to arms
Your finest hour won't be wasted, wasted
You say it's all a crisis,
You say it's all a blur
There comes a time you gotta face it, face it
Hey, hey - hell is what you make
Rise against your fate
Nothing's gonna keep you down,
Even if it's killing you
Because you know the truth
Listen up, listen up
There's a devil in the church
Got a bullet in the chamber and
This is gonna hurt
Let it out, let it out
You can scream and you can shout
But keep your secrets in the shadows and
You'll be sorry -
Everybody's on the run
And everybody's getting numb
Keep your secrets in the shadows and you'll be sorry

************

Are you with me now?
Come back from the dead -
You've been inside your head for too long
Are you with me now?
Find the places that scare you -
Come on I dare you
Are you with me?

After biking to my class in the frigid record breaking cold snap (it was like Xzibit had heard I liked to get dressed, so he put pants under my pants and shirts under my shirts, so I could wear clothes while I wore clothes) for my spanish class (because I am gonna be fluent, damnitt), which was awesomely diverse (thugged out thugs of many colors, flamboyantly made up gay dude with lots of flower tattoos - I was sitting between a blond redneck and a Phillipino, wut?)...alright this sentence is too long. Anyway I biked over to the health food store and got more priobiotics. I logged into my virtual classes and viewed their syllabi (<-- pfft) and did my dumb intros on the messageboards as required*.

I found out Elise's preschool teacher, Denise, who I ADORE and who is Aaron's friend's mom and our neighbor, has been out because she was hospitalized for e. coli and had to get a blood transfusion :/ She just got home Sunday. We're making her cards and baking her something. I feel so awful for her, and her family.

*Hi, everybody! I'm Cuban, from Key West, and live in Homestead. I'm a writer and a psych major. My husband is in I.T. and we have five closely spaced kids, aged 4-11. I've stayed home with them full time for the last decade - basically since high school graduation - but now that my youngest is in preschool it feels good to think about my own future again. I blog, have a childrens book that's being illustrated, and some short stories I'm self publishing for e-readers. This is my 3rd full time semester at Miami Dade College and I'm still trying to decide exactly what direction I'm going in with psychology. There are a lot of really great options to choose from and I still have a little while to decide.
I like cooking, mermaids, rum, thunderstorms, staying up too late, going to the beach at night, antique jewelry, roadtrips, bubble baths and Starbucks. I'm drawn towards the gothic and sensual, as a general rule. I dislike trips to the grocery store, my husband's very long commute, the sun shining directly on my face, and when people act as though curse words are really terrible. I'm very patient and my children make me happy, but I hate hearing nagging coming out of my mouth. We have afternoon tea outside most days, and I read to them before bed most nights. I love music and am a big fan of Florence and the Machine, Mumford and Sons, Queen, Vivaldi, and Bach. I'm extremely disgusted by wet paper, cigarettes, and ranch dressing.
I find it convenient that this course will force me to attend places and events I want to anyway but might have a hard time justifying otherwise.

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1. This house is WAY too quiet, too simple, too empty, without Aaron. He's been at Cybele's house since Sunday and I really, really miss him. He's having the time of his life. And apparently EFFORTLESSLY doing all his multiplication and creative writing every day, while Adrian does his schoolwork O_O The two of them are kayaking around in the canal full of manatees behind their house every day - since it's so cold, the manatees have had to swim inland and so they're actually kind of dense. They can feed them vegetables and pet them when they come up to breathe. Kayak battles in the swimming pool are also much more high stakes with the water so cold.

2. I spent quite awhile going over my degree audit, MDC's course sheets, FIU's psych dept transfer requirements, and ways to improve my GPA. My semester GPAs have been great but dropping out midway through classes years ago and getting a couple of Fs has made my cumulative abysmal :/ I just have to retake those two classes to replace the grades; both of them are courses I think I could ace fairly easily. THE POINT IS that after quite a lot of research, thought, conversation with Ananda since we were sitting at the dining table working on our separate things alone in the room, and so on...I am seriously considering going for my bachelor's in neuroscience at UM. Their neuroscience program is rigorous and I'd have to have a 3.8 to transfer in (which is possible if I do really really well for the second half of this AA, and replace those grades I mentioned, according to my calculations). You can choose a psychobiology or a neurobiology track for your bachelors, and your coursework is partially in their medical school, which is attached to teaching hospitals. It sounds so engaging, fascinating and challenging and just, wow. I've been seeking out neurology articles and books for 15 years, but really thinking about neuroplasticity specifically almost daily since Elise was born. You can go on from a bachelors in neuroscience to get a masters in psych, which has been my plan all along. It's just a masters in psych that allows you to be a lot more well versed in what is going on, on a physiological level, than a normal psych masters might - and to have more clout should you choose to research or write about your work in the field. It is not a math-centric curriculum at all, or I wouldn't even really consider it. Electrifying considerations!

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Last night I experienced one of the greatest moments of my life. I realize that is going to sound extremely melodramatic as you continue reading, but I am dead serious. I was feeling VERY overwhelmed about everything I'm working on right now. Good and capable, but also like it can be heavy and I might need to cry myself to sleep before getting up to start again. It was also colder than it's been in at least a year - "record breaking cold snap" is what everyone is saying, freeze warning, etc. I was very low on sleep, staring at my bed, shivering, thinking how early I was going to have to wake up and how difficult some of the things I'm committing myself to are going to be (non-educational things I haven't written about yet). I'm triggered by the cold. I can never sleep lately, either. And then Grant came in with a giant comforter hot out of the dryer and wrapped me in it from behind before I knew what was happening. I went into an uncontrollable giggling fit. Being surrounded in soft heat was like sudden euphoria. He also changed our sheets to fleece ones we had from a winter camping trip and had an electric blanket going on top of them; I stripped off all my clothes and lay down on all that, under this hot blanket, and seriously just laughed and rolled around in complete bliss for about 10 minutes.

I felt a lot better, and slept well, after that. The man is amazing. I was smiling about it on my way to class, this morning.

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2 am all to myself.


The view as I make dinner.


Twilight.


This kid's fashion sense always involves being in some kind of full-on get-up. He has a yellow and a purple bandanna that get used sometimes, several jackets that he creatively buttons (WHY WHY WHY), various gloves (some manufactured fingerless, others altered to be that way), and spends a crazy, obsessive amount of time on his hair every day. What you can't see in this pick is that he has on a sparkly purple and black striped nylon shirt from a previous dance performance. Grant keeps finding his mousse bottle empty.


Sisters listening to Charlotte's Web.


Starbucks bathroom and the outfit I'm living in.


A rare picture of my face that I don't think is horrible. I like my face in mirrors just fine, don't even bother with makeup - but I am NOT photogenic. Maybe I can print and cut this out tiny and paste it over my drivers' license shot...


Grant and I went and saw Sherlock Holmes the other night (which I recommend) and when we got back, Ananda was showing Elise songs and dresses and things.


We took the children to the zoo for the first time in almost a year (minus Aaron, since he's been gone). The first thing I thought when I saw them playing was how shockingly THIN they are. All my previous pictures of them playing in water feature poochy toddler/preschooler bellies!








Oh, Isaac. This is because he got "sprayed in the head" (and Grant was tending him, I was only slyly taking a picture not being neglectful).


And this is what Annie does while they play in the water.

What in the name of all that is holy is going on in this picture?! My 11 year old daughter is a woman.

A woman who still wears her Girl Scout shirt and likes milk and cookies.

They're getting ready to start selling cookies.

Ananda LOVES - L-O-V-E-S Loves her new girl scout troop. They are doing a "Sweden" booth at a fair at the Y this weekend (she's dressing up as well as painting a flag) as well as meeting on Monday to do initiation for new members (including her). The troop is also most likely going to the Rennaissance Festival soon, and down to the Dolphin Research Center, both of which are RIGHT up her alley. One of the girls in the troop (who she used to be in AWANA with) goes to the charter school where she will most likely be this fall. It is just great. I am really happy for her, for having it. She wears the tshirt with pride and I have a feeling she will be way more gung ho about GS camps by this coming summer (than she was last Summer).

She's also halfway through the 2nd Lord of the Rings book - she re-watched the first movie (with Aaron) after finishing book 1. Because they are challenging, she takes "breaks" to read more typical kids' chapter books. She spends A LOT of time writing a long, many-paged story lately, that she says will eventually be a trilogy of books, as well as working on "Doodle 4 Google" entries.


Aaron has got a group of boys (and one girl) that he is hanging out, riding bikes, eating fruit and snacks and playing basketball with for hours out of everyday, and LOVING it. It's really the first time in his life he's had neighbors he got along with (usually we drive a ways to get to playdates or sleepovers - he's just going down the street in a new direction now instead of across our corner to where the bullies hang out). I'm constantly sort of ill at ease about exactly how much freedom he should have, and re-evaluating that issue, but am also really excited for him. These all seem like genuinely nice kids with involved parents, and it's improved his overall mood in a big way. One of them also goes to the charter school in question, which is cool.

Aaron sold one of his two bikes for $20 to one of them...this is one of those things where I feel like, what - wait?! over how much freedom he should have. Yes, they are his bikes and he did not need two...so that is ok...isn't it?! I mean. I just don't know about him. He used eight of his dollars to buy a big chunk of honeycomb from the farmer's market yesterday that he keeps admiring as bee construction, and licking o_O

He also announced tonight that he wants an earring in his left ear, and is like, REALLY PUT OUT that we said if he still wants it in a few weeks he can probably do it. HOW IS THAT NOT AN AMAZINGLY COOL ANSWER FROM US?! WHAT DOES THIS KID WANT?


I'm reading the two of them Anne of Green Gables, which is going over well. They are both somewhat resigned and sighing and begrudging of my various personal crises lately, and I keep trying to talk to them about it and apologize to them for not "giving them" as much as usual. Mostly they are handling increased amounts of time with my brother as the "adult" in the house and such pretty well, and still sharing at least a couple of good talks and snuggly times with me per week (individually).


Isaac turned 7 on Sunday. He was thrilled to get a big lock box with a combination and key to hoarde his things in, and even happier that it was filled with all kinds of "treasure" (chocolate gold coins, Mario puzzle, his own rosary, small lego kit, dollar bills, etc). He got his main wishes, which were to eat donuts and candy and cake and other such crud all day long, and for his friend Adam to be at his party. We also took him to a "just Mom, Dad and Isaac" dinner in the evening, but he kept crying about very small things and generally didn't seem very excited about that.

He is still hard to please overall. And still adorable. He's missing one of his front teeth right now and the hole is GAPING since he has big gaps between all his teeth. His favorite things to do at the moment are count his money obsessively, play Monopoly with his siblings, and play Mario on the Wii (that game's new from Shaun). He's been having a renewed bout of nightmares :/

I really kind of worry about him a lot lately. Then other times I think I have nothing to be worried about.


Jake is so easy going and independent, for someone who is just five years old...he dissapears for many hours at a time, playing in the yard with whoever else is out there or looking at books quietly on his own in the library. He loves to do many pages at a time in BrainQuest workbooks and to "have love in the bed" (snuggle under covers together). He gets himself food when he's hungry (including bowls of cereal and making sandwiches), and goes and knocks on Rita and Ken's door next door when he thinks our cat is in their backyard, and stands by the edge of the road waiting to be handed the mail by the mailman every afternoon. Jake is a kid who asks forgiveness, not permission. He also loves to come to me and say things like, "I broke a glass, but I swept it all up" and "I got the cats food and water because they needed it" - but he HATES being told to do anything. He's basically been shocking me since the day he was born a nearly 10 pound content man-baby.

He still moves to our bed every night, in the middle of the night, and wakes with us in the morning. He does not like being woken up. And he gets really grumpy about certain predictable things - like being hungry or told what to do. He runs and jumps to be helpful in ways that are his own idea, though, and the more surprising the better (like when he comes and says, "Hey Mom I clicked 'I'm Still Listening' for you on Pandora" O_O).


Elise follows and climbs on and sits with me all day everyday, unless she's doing it to Grant or I physically leave the house without her. She wants to be getting tickled or kissed or hugged or chased or snuggled every minute. Sometimes this is wonderful, like when she is up on the step stool and I realize as she chatters that she has really picked up some cooking knowledge. Sometimes it's a little irritating, like when she's got the smaller broom and is redistributing my dirt pile in her effort to "help" as I sweep. Sometimes it is weird, like when she can point at and name my facebook friends (who she's never met) by their tiny icon pictures. She also understands about levels in Tetris and makes intuitive comments about phone conversations when she's eavesdropping. I have to peel her off of me, push her gently out of my bedroom door and then lock it, to get a moment alone to talk to Grant or what have you. Mostly her smothering affections make me happy, though.

I really, REALLY miss her hair since I cut it :/ And it seems all for nought since her scalp problems and thus brushing problems cleared up RIGHT AFTER the cutting anyway! It's been straight and kind of stringy and sort of boyish in a uniform length, shoulder length way ever since I chopped the curls, and she does not care at all, but combined with how she is prone to dressing in ill-matched brother clothes I am just not feeling it :p

She also comes in our bed each night, and sometimes starts the night with Grant in bed while I waste time out here. She's been on a big drawing kick lately and has really blown my mind by independently drawing DISCERNIBLE THINGS! She'll bring me a sun or an owl and as she announces to me what the drawing is I see it :D She also talks about how she can't wait to start preschool daily, and goes on and on about how much she loves school even though she hasn't went yet. "Me go school and love it, then me know me love it".


The three younger kids have been looking very raggedy since our washer broke, as we are still just doing a load every other day on average at Grant Sr's, with a necessary emphasis on towels and Grant's work clothes :/ It's leading to the littles (who have less each, since they are still growing faster so they don't accumulate as much) wearing a lot of bottom of the barrel things that are ill-fitting or worn out or both. Hopefully we will have something new in by this weekend. In the meantime I am seriously considering taking our INSANE MOUNTAIN OF LAUNDRY to a wash-dry-fold place and paying someone a flat fee to give it all back to us ready for putting away. I'm honestly not sure it's worth trying to bag up and haul all of it, I think it might really be less of a hassle to just keep it moving through for 48 hours solid when the new washer is in place. I mean it must be more than a dozen (high capacity) loads at this point O_O

I DID find a couple of agitator models that fill with water, btw! We're most likely ordering one of them tomorrow for next day delivery.


I took all five kids and walked to the trolley stop and took the free trolley with them over to the farmer's market, yesterday. They cannot get enough of that trolley, because it has NO SEATBELTS OR CARSEATS and they can ALL RIDE WITH A WINDOW SEAT AND OPEN THEIR OWN WINDOWS. Annie adores it in a purposely aloof, sophisticated, picturing herself there in her seat with her earbuds in as she gazes at the scenery way and Isaac loves it in a bouncing in his seat, wide-eyed with excitement way, but they are all still so obviously digging it. I can tell we are really annoying to the one or two other passengers who tend to be people who actually have to take public transit to somewhere they actually need to be, but hey, it is what it is.

I have no idea why our broke city got a grant for a FREE TROLLEY SYSTEM to run all day every day on multiple routes, but hey, again...it is what it is?


I have been really impressed with how much housework they are all capable of accomplishing regularly (DOMESTIC LABOR SQUAD FTW!!).


Personal and picture updates to come...