Aug. 22nd, 2012

altarflame: (Default)
Ok. Isaac came home two nights ago - he's on a high fiber diet with lots of water and miralax, and probiotics, as well as taking a walk every day and having a follow-up (GI) appt scheduled. Yesterday, he stayed home and relaxed. Today, he had his first day of school.

I was happy with how the morning went - I got him up really early, so he could play on the computer and eat breakfast and feel relaxed before we went in. I walked him to class since it's his first day, and the teacher I met at the door acted happy to see him and concerned about how he's doing. They were really sweet and concerned about him being at the hospital. I explained that he might have to use the bathroom more than other students and reiterated that he has a reading disorder (something noted on paperwork I'd previously turned in).



I was worried about him, because I'm feeling really vulnerable about him right now, and protective, but also proud of him - walking into a brand new class for the first time on the third day, he was really brave and calm about it.

So then, at about 1:30, I got a call from one of the teachers (it's a combined 2nd/3rd grade class with two teachers). Basically, she was really nice, and said Isaac is very sweet and tries really hard but 3rd grade is an FCAT year and he's going to fail if he can't read, and thus be held back. She doesn't want his self esteem to suffer from that being his first experience of school. She suggested we take him back out and put him in next year, when it's not an FCAT year.

I can't help but have it screaming in my mind that schools and teachers are graded based on student performance and that weighs in, here.

I asked if she didn't think we could maybe get him reading by the end of the year, and she talked about how hard the test is and how after her years of experience, no. She said they could give him time on starfall and have him in "intervention" every day, but it wouldn't be good enough. She also said that even kids who have been in real school for years sometimes fail this test O_O

I told her I'd talk to his father, and his counselor, and him, and think about it.

So I went and got him, and he was SO EXCITED as he got in the van, literally jumping in yelling, "I'm SO GLAD I WENT TO SCHOOL!!!" and telling me all these stories. This is what I was hoping for, since he ADORED GMYS camp over the summer (and last summer). He really seems to thrive in structured environments with other adults and non-sibling kids in a big way, he eats it up...

The teachers and some kind of ESE specialist came over to the van, too, and had these sort of apologetic polite smiles, and dude. I don't get this, ok? I was being HYPER POLITE, and not hijacking in any way, and they were just being so bitchy to me! Like totally appalled that homeschoolers don't get graded, confused/accusatory about how he's passed previous grades, dismissive and scornful about one proposed solution I wanted to run by them (registering him as a second grader to give him extra time to catch up, since he wouldn't have to even change classes for that to work).

I left feeling really frustrated, with Isaac relatively unaware and just prattling on in the backseat nonstop about RECESS and the friend he made and how he loves it.

I didn't even have Isaac evaluated at the end of this school year, which is necessary for promotion within the legal homeschool guidelines, since I knew he was going into school. I tried to present that as a possible loophole for how they could say he really should be a 2nd grader - holding him back in advance, basically - but "The county" and "already registered" and appalled because apparently they had no idea homeschoolers just "Get evaluated" and they were talking over/not even hearing me, and ugh. UGH. I mean I wrote in and verbally told them he has a diagnosed reading disorder, so why is everyone acting so surprised now that he can't read???


I can tell they want him out of there. But I don't think, based on what I've seen so far, that that will impact the way they treat him, if he stays. Part of me thinks I can just sit Isaac down and explain that he might be in 3rd grade twice and he'll be fine with that - Isaac doesn't give a shit about grades anyway, as a crazy vagabond homeschooler :p Isn't part of the whole self esteem crushing shame thing how it's handled, treated and presented? I also feel like it's very possible he'll be reading pretty well by the end of the year and that's it's bullshit on their part to assume that's not something that could happen.

It's not like it wouldn't have an emotional impact to have went shopping for supplies and for uniforms and counted down for weeks and have a great first day, and then get pulled out, either. Fucking assholes. How can you pretty much say to me in one breath that you think homeschooling is questionable and homeschoolers don't learn much, AND THEN ALSO that he should be put back in homeschool? You have basically just told me you don't actually care about outcomes for my child at all, only your establishment.

I have some fear that I should be worried about them pulling him out of that class and sticking him in a special needs class...he's not actually learning disabled in general, is above average intelligence and fine in math, science, generalized social studies and history knowledge. He has a huge vocabulary and very impressive comprehension.

They want to see my documentation now, about his reading disorder, which I get but am not necessarily thrilled about since it's grouped in with a lot of other information I'm not eager to share with them, since it's a whole-person, emotional/personality/academic/etc assessment and Isaac has had some issues I don't think are any of their business. Like Grant's and my personal fears and suspicions about him are in those papers, and examples of disturbing stories Isaac made up.


Basically everything I don't like about public schools (learning/teaching for a test, institutionalized mindsets, weird prejudices against anyone who doesn't fit in, not being able to cater to individual kids' strengths and weaknesses, having to adhere to all kinds of protocol even when it isn't effective) is at work here, and so maybe I should just be like YOU SEE!! ...but it isn't that simple. Because I really think this would be very good for him - maybe great for him - right now, on many levels :/

I'm trying to decide what an email to his teacher should say, whether or not to go in early tomorrow and meet with them, and whether I should take this moment to seize onto a determination to do extra work with him every evening and weekend and get him into external tutoring (because I DO feel like I'm hitting a brick wall with him, myself, here)...

They get a ton of homeschoolers over there, I've known many who come from or go into that school. We aren't some kind of anomaly in that, and so I can't really figure out how we could have gotten off on the wrong foot such that I'd be getting attitudes. I came in and met with them about him being in the hospital earlier this week (which I would assume would earn us some extra sympathy or at least less rudeness? Hello?), he showed up in his uniform, before class started, with ALL the supplies (I carried in 4 bags aside from the lunchbox and backpack he had). I answered the phone right away when they called, talked to them at pick up and am referencing having had him assessed and in counseling - isn't all this the kind of thing teachers want/like/wish for, from parents? Or do they just wish for good test scores from naturally advanced students?

I'm thinking about this, more, I guess... I also really wonder if the "getting him registered as a 2nd grader," bit might be totally plausible if I push through it and do my own research. I mean it's only the first week of school - my older kids' "official," state-run virtual school classes don't even start until September 1.

Argh.

ETA: This is the vocabulary definitions Isaac brought home, that I'm supposed to study with him.


Have these teachers not even heard of tenses or conjugation O_o GOOD GRIEF!!

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