What a bunch of hoohaw...
Sep. 24th, 2005 03:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
altarflameToday is the freaking PITS. I don't even know where to start, my ranting will get too long. Suffice to say Isaac is having the same day he was having the last time I ranted, except that today he's getting into the garbage every few minutes and pouring out every drawer and bin he can get his hands on over and over again.
He's healthy, he's happy, he's cute. He's pretty bright and very affectionate. But he also has a horrible temper and no sense of boundaries at all. It seems kind of sensationalist to say that a 19 month old is "completely out of control". But damnitt he pays NO ATTENTION to anything I say to him, even if I yell or clap my hands together. The only way to get him to even pause in anything that he is doing is to physically stop him. I am seriously considering some baby gates (though they would only work with a bedroom, our house isn't set up for baby gates at all) or even a playpen (I've never even HAD a playpen...)
You can't leave him alone for a minute. Like, literally, a minute is far too long. If he ISN'T in the bathroom with me while I pee or outside the door screaming, I WILL come out to find him digging in the garbage, standing on top of the dining table, dumping something out everywhere, etc. Yesterday I spent most of the afternoon clearing his drag-and-drop clutter from the living room, the hallway, my and the kids' bedroom, and then vaccuming (that's all the carpeted areas of the house). It took so long because he was continuing to drag and drop the entire time I was doing it. Finally as I was vaccuming the last room, he ran out and I was just relieved. But in the time it took me to finish Aaron's play rug (the kind with roads and a city all over it), Isaac brought me a steak knife that he got out of the dishwasher. I almost started crying.
I almost started crying again today. I called Grant on his cell even though he had just ran to the grocery store around the corner, to tell him I was going to have a nervous breakdown. I was forcing the kids to clean up their trashed room (that I just had spotless and vaccumed late yesterday), even though Isaac made the whole mess, and Aaron had already been crying twice because Isaac just kept running in there and undoing everything he tried to do. Which was really, really frustrating to me, as I was trying to hang up clothes and had already had to stop 6 or 7 times to get Isaac out of the freaking trash.
I've always favored pro-active over reactive parenting, and tried to anticipate things, plan ahead, etc. But I feel totally incapable of keeping ahead of him, especially right now (when it's hard to get up, I'm not as fast as normal, and I'm hormonal to boot...)
There is no way to adequately childproof this place for him. We have latches on the "dangerous" kitchen cabinet, and glass stuff up high, and outlet covers. We don't use the bottom 3 shelves of the pantry or the fridge door at all, and have removed all of our dvds from the living room after having to put them all back up on the rack twice a day for a month. There is a strict "bathroom door stays closed" rule that only gets accidentally broken rarely. But like the kids' room, I can't really put anything up high enough that he can't manage to get it, or they won't be able to, either. I can't suspend the garbage from the ceiling. I can't guard my pile of folded clothes while I go to run and sop up something he spilled, so he tears it all up and throws it everywhere while I'm out of the way. He DEMOLISHES Ananda's dollhouse every single day, it's part of her bedtime routine to go all over her room and the house getting the furniture and reassembling it.
Does anyone have any suggestions here? Short of tying him up or beating him? Because I've already thought of those options. Maybe I can start using his little feeding chair for timeouts and it will form a pavlov-style connection that will make him want to eat less...
ETA - He is not trying to get attention the only way he can...He's still nursing on demand and I sit down with him and read to him frequently throughout the day. Grant also does roughhouse-style play with him at least a couple of times a day. His attention span for books is improving, as well, and he's still learning new words and sometimes amazes me with the "conversations" we have - so I really don't think he has any actual comprehension or hearing problems, either. He just ignores me whenever convenient. We go out often enough that I wouldn't think he's bored out of his mind - we were just in a forest-y park where I let him pick up leaves and flowers and explore independantly for an hour, yesterday afternoon, and he was out running in the rain with the other two, the day before that. We take a walk with the stroller just about every day. SOIDGJ:OFJ"IOPJKM":LH}_+)_(#%
He's healthy, he's happy, he's cute. He's pretty bright and very affectionate. But he also has a horrible temper and no sense of boundaries at all. It seems kind of sensationalist to say that a 19 month old is "completely out of control". But damnitt he pays NO ATTENTION to anything I say to him, even if I yell or clap my hands together. The only way to get him to even pause in anything that he is doing is to physically stop him. I am seriously considering some baby gates (though they would only work with a bedroom, our house isn't set up for baby gates at all) or even a playpen (I've never even HAD a playpen...)
You can't leave him alone for a minute. Like, literally, a minute is far too long. If he ISN'T in the bathroom with me while I pee or outside the door screaming, I WILL come out to find him digging in the garbage, standing on top of the dining table, dumping something out everywhere, etc. Yesterday I spent most of the afternoon clearing his drag-and-drop clutter from the living room, the hallway, my and the kids' bedroom, and then vaccuming (that's all the carpeted areas of the house). It took so long because he was continuing to drag and drop the entire time I was doing it. Finally as I was vaccuming the last room, he ran out and I was just relieved. But in the time it took me to finish Aaron's play rug (the kind with roads and a city all over it), Isaac brought me a steak knife that he got out of the dishwasher. I almost started crying.
I almost started crying again today. I called Grant on his cell even though he had just ran to the grocery store around the corner, to tell him I was going to have a nervous breakdown. I was forcing the kids to clean up their trashed room (that I just had spotless and vaccumed late yesterday), even though Isaac made the whole mess, and Aaron had already been crying twice because Isaac just kept running in there and undoing everything he tried to do. Which was really, really frustrating to me, as I was trying to hang up clothes and had already had to stop 6 or 7 times to get Isaac out of the freaking trash.
I've always favored pro-active over reactive parenting, and tried to anticipate things, plan ahead, etc. But I feel totally incapable of keeping ahead of him, especially right now (when it's hard to get up, I'm not as fast as normal, and I'm hormonal to boot...)
There is no way to adequately childproof this place for him. We have latches on the "dangerous" kitchen cabinet, and glass stuff up high, and outlet covers. We don't use the bottom 3 shelves of the pantry or the fridge door at all, and have removed all of our dvds from the living room after having to put them all back up on the rack twice a day for a month. There is a strict "bathroom door stays closed" rule that only gets accidentally broken rarely. But like the kids' room, I can't really put anything up high enough that he can't manage to get it, or they won't be able to, either. I can't suspend the garbage from the ceiling. I can't guard my pile of folded clothes while I go to run and sop up something he spilled, so he tears it all up and throws it everywhere while I'm out of the way. He DEMOLISHES Ananda's dollhouse every single day, it's part of her bedtime routine to go all over her room and the house getting the furniture and reassembling it.
Does anyone have any suggestions here? Short of tying him up or beating him? Because I've already thought of those options. Maybe I can start using his little feeding chair for timeouts and it will form a pavlov-style connection that will make him want to eat less...
ETA - He is not trying to get attention the only way he can...He's still nursing on demand and I sit down with him and read to him frequently throughout the day. Grant also does roughhouse-style play with him at least a couple of times a day. His attention span for books is improving, as well, and he's still learning new words and sometimes amazes me with the "conversations" we have - so I really don't think he has any actual comprehension or hearing problems, either. He just ignores me whenever convenient. We go out often enough that I wouldn't think he's bored out of his mind - we were just in a forest-y park where I let him pick up leaves and flowers and explore independantly for an hour, yesterday afternoon, and he was out running in the rain with the other two, the day before that. We take a walk with the stroller just about every day. SOIDGJ:OFJ"IOPJKM":LH}_+)_(#%
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no subject
Date: 2005-09-27 04:34 pm (UTC)I've never really dealt with the "mine" thing, and I think I'm glad, because I would have a hard time dealing with telling a child everything belonged to them - even if they were willing to share!
Isaac is a pisces on the cusp of aquarius.
And he can't reach/use doorknobs yet, so that's not too big of an issue. We just can't consistently keep every door in the house closed with the other two kids coming in and out of places all day.
no subject
Date: 2005-09-27 04:49 pm (UTC)maybe try a less ordered approach to him, and when you do absolutly need to him to something, make it an elaborate game fo pretend?
aquarians are loony. so you have a loony mercurial control freak! woo!
feel free to ingore me. i'd suggest reading up on pisces online to get some more insight.
no subject
Date: 2005-09-27 04:52 pm (UTC)and taraus is stubborn as hell. so he's a stubborn little king.