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[altarflame]

Things I've Learned in College so Far:

1. A semicolon can only be used in circumstances when the words on either side of it could each be a complete sentence.

2. How to graph an equation.

3. All about this whole "power of now" movement as represented by the film "The Secret".

4. The name of a good art therapist that Annie now sees.

5. That in Iraq, when soldiers catch a guy asleep at his post on the cots they have in the desert, they put their nuts on his eyes with their penis draped down the dude's face (as a mock up of a "long Arabian nose"), and this is called "Arabian goggles".

6. APA formatting guidelines, and how to make them happen easily in Word 2007.

7. Exactly what all this talk of our country's debt is all about and what it could mean in the future.

8. A little bit about honing my (assigned, or for-publication) writing through having a more defined thesis.

9. That for many other intelligent people, analyzing literature or constructing an essay is as difficult as math is for me (this was actually an epiphany).

10. A couple of poems I'd never heard before, most notably "Here a Pretty Baby Lies".

11. Several definitions of plagiarism I'd been previously unaware of (like reusing your own work, or paraphrasing in certain ways even though you cite the source in your reference page).

12. How to use the college library's online database for research.

13. Where the bike racks and vending machines are, and that one of those vending machines will continuously refund your dimes while racking them up on the total you have to spend.

14. Way more than I ever wanted to know about appeals processes, financial aid stipulations, how the advisement department operates, parking decals, book advances, requirements for my own major and different degrees, and so on. Sometimes I think I'm really getting a degree in (not at) Miami Dade College.

15. How fully determined what and how you learn and even the grade you get can be determined by the professor you have. Also, fulltime (not adjunct) professors with tenure are sort of insane, and I love that.

16. I might really enjoy teaching college, at least as an adjunct or temporarily.


The extent to which I am more confident than almost everyone else (to answer questions or volunteer for something, to be honest or comfortable speaking in front of a class, to take the lead and make it happen when working in groups) is continuously jarring for me. I truly just do not understand what the hell the big deal is for everybody else. I thought raging anxiety about things like this were something a minority suffered from related to "conditions" (like an anxiety disorder or a problem leaving the house). It's also interesting to me how it SEEMS anecdotally to be the kids right out of high school and the older, middle aged folks who are most shy and panic the worst when called upon for anything, and the 27-35 set that is most chill, but I'm not sure if that's really accurate from the 8 classes worth of experience at two local campuses that I'm drawing on here.

I mean, we had an assignment (in english, to come up with writing prompts) to work in pairs sharing embarrassing moments and I was actually shocked and confused at, A, the things these people thought were embarassing (mixing up words in a way that caused people to laugh is one example; I would laugh along with others at myself in that situation and never think of it again), and B, that it was HARD for people to share them (ok, your shorts slipped a little and someone saw your underwear in high school...how long ago was that? It's not like we can see them right now? That is a totally standard embarassing experience, not some CUH-razy wild thing that reflects so terribly on you...). I am not an asshole who calls others out or voices these things, but I sit there thinking to myself, uh...seriously?

How can people even go through daily life with these levels of self consciousness?

I find myself in the very awkward situation of either answering every single question asked or enduring these long, uncomfortable pauses while the teachers stare around the room paraphrasing different ways until giving up and stating the answers with explanations. I don't think I'm some kind of super genius (and I sound more like The Dude than Hermione) - I think other people are afraid to put themselves out there in even the most minor ways. Which I find baffling as all get out.

For the past two days I've been considering how this could be hugely advantageous to me as I pursue various goals. It is apparently a real edge that I've been taking for granted.


Sidenote: I REALLY prefer going from one hour and 15 minute long class to the next with a short break in between, on Mondays and Wednesdays (as I am now that we're in the Fall semester), vs sitting in a single 3 hour long class a couple of times per week (like I was in the summer). The religion class I wrote about a couple of entries back is still 3 hours long once a week, but that I can deal with since it freaking rocks.

Comments

[noelove.livejournal.com]

35 is also called 'teabagging". dont ask me how I know this.

[altarflame.livejournal.com]

Doesn't almost EVERYONE know about teabagging? I read an article recently talking about how foolish and self depracating it was for the tea party people to name themselves that, and now the poor fools don't even know what others are doing when they call them teabaggers :p

[idiolecto.livejournal.com]

I've also heard it called "The Roman Soldier." You know, in my vast study of the topic of ball and penis placement? ;)

[idiolecto.livejournal.com]

It's really interesting for me -- a university instructor -- to read this. Right now I'm teaching first year composition for international students, and all I want in life is to teach my students something that (1) they can use in other classes or their future career and (2) that they didn't already know. According to some of my peers in the department, this makes me a mindless capitalist, but I like to think I'm pragmatic. ;)

In my defense, my approach to teaching is based on the fact that I've spent most of my career teaching non-traditional students (adult second language learners) who don't have time to fuck around writing movie reviews. They want jobs, yo! Sometimes I find it hard to relate to students who came to college just because it was expected and for whom the stakes are very low.

In conclusion, I would like to have a student like you in my class. Silent classes = death.

[altarflame.livejournal.com]

I love this comment, and wish I could be a fly on the wall in one of your classes, now.

[altarflame.livejournal.com]

Also, haha, my composition class (well, literature and composition, basically english 2) actually did movie reviews tonight ;) We did an initial "diagnostic essay" for her to see our strengths and weaknesses, that was supposed to make the reader want to either read a book, watch a movie, watch a show or attend a play that we ourselves would recommend.

[jesschica24.livejournal.com]

I honestly think that the majority of people who don't speak up in class (especially in smaller classes) are lazy, not anxious about speaking up. I hated that in college; it was so awkward and made the class hard to get into. Law school was better because people were more overachieving, plus a lot of classes basically required everyone to participate.

[altarflame.livejournal.com]

Well, I was basing my "anxious" diagnosis on the extreme anxiety they exhibit and sometimes complain about when they're forced to answer or (God forbid) called up to talk. Also, I've had multiple examples of people being offered incentives to participate and all seeming to look around nervous and sink down in their chairs - things like extra credit, and getting to leave early. I'm sure laziness could be a contributing factor for some here, though.

[jesschica24.livejournal.com]

You could be right, and I've just never given anyone the benefit of the doubt. :) The ironic thing is, it feels much more comfortable to participate if everyone is participating; at least I always felt more self-conscious if I was the only one. But somehow the teacher has to get everyone over that hump.

[jesschica24.livejournal.com]

Also, by "lazy," I mean that it's easier to sit there and be a passive listener than to think of things to contribute.

[altarflame.livejournal.com]

Yes.

Also, it's not like I have to think very hard to come up with the answer to questions like "And what is 'omniscient'?"

[(Anonymous)]

the social speaking anxiety is strange when it happens personally and you arent expecting it. like, sitting in class and you're just fine, listening intently, know the material.. and suddenly the teacher calls on you and WHAT?! OMG I CANT REMEMBER WHERE I EVEN AM. on my wedding day while reciting my vows i got so nervous that i began speaking in a southern accent.. im from portland, oregon. so. it's just a strange strange thing to go through.

[altarflame.livejournal.com]

I hope you'll pardon my saying that is hilarious and awesome.

I think that I was desensitized to embarrassment as a 9 year old, when I used to arrive at school daily on the handlebars of my stepdad's 10 speed - said stepdad clad only in hot pink swim trunks, high top sneakers, and knee high tube socks that had been rolled down to the ankle. Oh, and big reflective sunglasses. Did I mention he had very long, clown-wig-curly hair? Once that year my mother got called in for a conference and she arrived smoking a cigarette, wearing a shirt that said "If you wanna complain about my badass attitude, dial 1-800-EAT-SHIT". Point being, I had to buck up early and decide I LIKED standing out for survival :p

[itsyspy70.livejournal.com]

I would hazard a guess that those "embarrassing" stories are not in fact those people's actual most embarrassing stories, they are simply safe stories that can be easily related to as universally embarrassing without being too personal or potentially traumatic to recount to a roomful of strangers. I don't think it's particularly dishonest to have a stock story for that kind of a throwaway prompt in a one-time class.

I have a great deal of stories I can tell depending on how comfortable I am with a given group, or how comfortable I want them to be with me. Everyone has their own triggers, tho I'm with you on not really understanding nudity/comfort with one's own body as being anything to be phobic about!

I agree with you on the scheduling stuff... seminar classes seem like a good idea (especially with the rigamarole that is driving to and from and PARKING for classes) but honestly it's hard to be engaged and focused on the material for such long stretches.

[altarflame.livejournal.com]

I totally agree that it wouldn't be most embarrassing stories that got shared, but....how could that even be stock?! I dunno.

[itsyspy70.livejournal.com]

Also I am always completely baffled at why guys actually do stuff like teabagging. You're going to position yourself so you are pantsless/exposed genitals and then artfully drape your bits and pieces across someone's face? What? What if they wake up suddenly and headbutt you in the balls? It's just super awkward body positioning, doesn't make any sense to me. I'd understand peeing on each other, but applying ones nutsack to someone else's face sounds like something that you didn't mean to do while playing twister, not something you intentionally do to "shame" another.

[aranel.livejournal.com]

If I were asked to recite an embarrassing story in a college class, I hope I'd have the courage to stand up and walk out. What is this, college or Seventeen magazine? I'm an easy, confident talker-in-class but would be extremely annoyed to be asked that.

[altarflame.livejournal.com]

My Student Life Skills class, which was admittedly complete and utter bs start to finish, was graded almost completely on "class participation" and the only participating she was having us do, was share personal things. I mean like everything from "What's a time someone betrayed you?" to "When did you wish you had more courage to do something differently?" to "What was the best part of your week?" I guess after that a personal question that leads to an actual writing assignment didn't make me bat an eye ;)

[aranel.livejournal.com]

Ah, so in other words, the class was explicitly set up to see whether people were willing to jump through a few hoops to be allowed to re-enroll and/or get financial aid again.

Education Failings

[robert jones (from livejournal.com)]

1.) This is Bobby if the Google sign-in process didn't work out. Hi. Long time no comment, amirite?

2.) Many of the situations your are describing in those classes are the same thing I complained about my entire college career thus far. I'd attribute about 30% of it to laziness, 10% to genuine anxiety and genuine ignorance, but almost all of the rest I attribute to students being utterly TERRIFIED of being "wrong" or failing. The educational system set in place for k-12 is one of utter reliance on NOT being wrong. Every question has a right answer and to get any of them wrong will label you a failure and taint you with shame forever.

Part of this has been brought about by the way we evaluate schools at the district and national levels. The FCAT and other standardized tests have forced teachers to be far less bold in their teaching styles, they are unable to take risks and teach through failure. Ultimately this is a terrible system because failure is the thing that teaches children the MOST about themselves.

As a result college classrooms are full of people that just want to get the answer that will "be on the test" and don't want to explore the material any further than that. Therefore they do not speak up in class because they might be wrong, and being wrong is akin to outright failure.

Re: Education Failings

[altarflame.livejournal.com]

Hi, and yeah did you like go way back to read because you quit at some point, or have you been holding on to this opinion?

I've been thinking about this, and I think you're right. It's not something I considered before because 1. I was fortunate enough to be in gifted programs and AP classes (BEFORE the FCAT...I was in the very last graduating class to take the old HCT), and 2. obviously my kids don't even get graded at all... when I'm feeling insecure about homsechool it's actually what I think of as my best encouragement/biggest accomplishment, that they just all feel ok being who they are and being interested in what they naturally would be.

Sidenote: I really miss you being on facebook. I didn't realize how many pictures and little anecdotes about A and A I would normally end up sharing only there; now I feel like I'm excluding you, if I do that.