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Mar. 16th, 2011 12:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
altarflameBob: Where can I put this (cannister of pringles), so Grant won't forget it in the morning?
Me: Nowhere. He will forget it.
Bob: lol
Me: I'm being serious. If you want to make sure he takes something, I usually put it under his wallet or tape it to the front door, but neither of those strategies is guaranteed.
The other morning I walked around looking at the lunch he'd left in the fridge, and the iPod he'd loaded with music but then left, and his bathroom disarray. I sent him an amused email saying that while I can walk around and laugh lovingly about my absent minded husband, I think if he were anyone else I'd assume he'd been abducted while in the middle of getting ready for work and call the police.
I got a lot of nothing done today. Meaning I accomplished most everything on my to-do list but none of it amounted to anything.
-I swept as I often do and mopped for the first time in forever, but the floor is already messed up again
-I made phone calls I've been needing to, but just left messages and got lackluster results
-Went to take the CPT with Laura in place to babysit only to find the testing hours I'd double checked were actually only for all the other campuses
I cried a lot. About my faith issues and my marriage issues. And felt better about both, and then worse, and then better again. Grant is more than willing to talk/cry with me. This is best when it merges into ultra-lovey sex.
I have an appt on Friday, with the therapist he started seeing on Saturday.
And a study guide, for the CPT, so maybe I can brush up some math skills (HAHA) before I take it.
I'm eating WAY TOO MUCH as a coping technique and keep thinking I have to stop that immediately. Burying the gonna-puke anxiety feeling is not working; I just add indigestion. Then eat more.
Hopefully I'm gonna go to bed now, and actually be able to sleep. Because today, I really can't tell what is really my thoughts and makes sense, and what is just sleep deprivation because last night, I just hurt too much to sleep.
Me: Nowhere. He will forget it.
Bob: lol
Me: I'm being serious. If you want to make sure he takes something, I usually put it under his wallet or tape it to the front door, but neither of those strategies is guaranteed.
The other morning I walked around looking at the lunch he'd left in the fridge, and the iPod he'd loaded with music but then left, and his bathroom disarray. I sent him an amused email saying that while I can walk around and laugh lovingly about my absent minded husband, I think if he were anyone else I'd assume he'd been abducted while in the middle of getting ready for work and call the police.
I got a lot of nothing done today. Meaning I accomplished most everything on my to-do list but none of it amounted to anything.
-I swept as I often do and mopped for the first time in forever, but the floor is already messed up again
-I made phone calls I've been needing to, but just left messages and got lackluster results
-Went to take the CPT with Laura in place to babysit only to find the testing hours I'd double checked were actually only for all the other campuses
I cried a lot. About my faith issues and my marriage issues. And felt better about both, and then worse, and then better again. Grant is more than willing to talk/cry with me. This is best when it merges into ultra-lovey sex.
I have an appt on Friday, with the therapist he started seeing on Saturday.
And a study guide, for the CPT, so maybe I can brush up some math skills (HAHA) before I take it.
I'm eating WAY TOO MUCH as a coping technique and keep thinking I have to stop that immediately. Burying the gonna-puke anxiety feeling is not working; I just add indigestion. Then eat more.
Hopefully I'm gonna go to bed now, and actually be able to sleep. Because today, I really can't tell what is really my thoughts and makes sense, and what is just sleep deprivation because last night, I just hurt too much to sleep.
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no subject
Date: 2011-03-16 12:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-16 10:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-16 10:27 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-17 01:59 am (UTC)Can we be friends? If I could draw check yes or no boxes, I would. I feel that goofy about asking. I really dig you and I love reading what you write.
no subject
Date: 2011-03-17 06:29 am (UTC)Also, this is so insanely sweet <3 I feel REALLY AWKWARD AND HORRIBLE saying that I am not really adding anyone because I'm having a very hard time finding "internet time" as it is and try hard to read and comment on everyone I have added now...but I feel like such a giant asshole :/ I sometimes get time and end up going and lurk-reading and/or commenting on people who have me added but it seems wrong to me to just add people I'm gonna skim and scroll by. Please don't take this the wrong way! I don't mind you adding me AT ALL and hope you understand. Ever since I started trying to prioritize writing I have to TRY to update this thing, and I know it's only going to get worse when I'm taking classes as well, come summer...
no subject
Date: 2011-03-17 08:13 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-17 04:38 am (UTC)That is such a sad thing to read.
I hope you're feeling better.
no subject
Date: 2011-03-17 06:30 am (UTC)I am feeling better tonight. I hope I can keep feeling better.