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Aug. 7th, 2008 09:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
altarflameHaving spent the last two nights in a row here at Our House, I think I can say we are now Living Here. On air mattresses in the tv room and Jake and Isaac's room, but...you know, it's working :p
There is such an incredible, surprising, AMAZING difference in convenience, being in a place that FITS US. The kitchen alone is so time saving - I can make 7 pieces of turkey bacon at a time on the bigger George Foreman. I can toast 4 slices of bread at once with this toaster oven. The stove is so fast that it took me awhile to adjust, but now that I have - WOW. Water is boiling within 2 and a half minutes of being on. Everything just cooks so much faster. The oven preheats so much faster. Meals in general are seriously taking me between half and 3/4 the time they were at the old place.
The dishwasher holds a ton more at once, as well as some items that just plain wouldn't have fit in the old one I was using at all (stock pot? serving plates? no problem). I have less loads in a day. And everything is clean at the end of each one, with nothing needing to go back through.
Same with our "Canyon Capacity" washer and dryer.
The bathrooms stay so clean just because there are two and they're both spacious. Before anything set on our nonexistant counter was knocked off constantly, drips from handwashing ended up in the constantly overflowing garbage that was crammed between the tiny vanity and the toilet, the only way to get behind the toilet to clean was with a rag on hands and knees, etc etc...this is SO MUCH BETTER.
I'm still cleaning and cooking A LOT, but it's so much more efficient and rewarding, now.
Our dining table has more clearance with a leaf in all the time here than it did with no leaves over at the old house. And they will both go in, inside (remember my pics of Thanksgiving Dinner on the back patio, last year?)
I am shamelessly swept away with the Jolie-Pitts' new babies. Rich, beautiful A-List celebrities proudly flaunting a blended family of 6 small kids, telling People magazine all about tandem nursing, and the only childcare help from his parents who are staying with them. No live-in Nanny, just a super involved Dad. I totally bought that magazine, and feel good about how they are giving every penny of the $14million they got for the pics to charity.
I told Ananda and Aaron a sort of bullet-point rundown of their family history and it turned into this huge homeschool discussion wherein they learned about:
-that big budget movies travel not just an hour like they did with Shaun, for filming, but across oceans to other continents
-Cambodian landmines
-Tibetan monks
-starvation in Ethiopia
-malaria in impoverished nations
-where Vietnam is
-what the United Nations is
-the efforts to rebuild New Orleans post-Katrina (which they knew all about, as Katrina hit us first and we watched the news as it intensified and struck again...)
-that "chateau" is the french word for "castle"
-How crappy our society is with our celebrity worship (they had no idea previously, we never buy those magazines or talk about movie stars under non Jolie-Pitt baby circumstances), and how people who wield power (lots and lots of money, people caring about what they have to say and interviewing them on tv) can use that for good things that have nothing to do with Hollywood, if they want to
-etc, etc, etc
Heck yes Maddox is sporting a blue mohawk. I'd like to see someone give them some flack for that, can you imagine - "that poor child would be so much better off back in the orphanage with a decent haircut, what if he needs to get an office job one day..." :p
A weird issue I'm dealing with:
Ananda and Aaron were born 13 months apart and have been joined at the hip ever since. They're going to be sharing a room here, for a couple of more years before that is too weird, and they've historically taken baths together from infancy...until about a year ago. It started seeming like an issue to me, then, as she started acting hormonal and he started yanking up the covers when I'd come in the room to tuck him in at night. Now she's in a training bra and he's had a big old crush on a girl. But they're only 7 and 8. I had just said they were too physically big to bathe together anymore in that little tub at Grant Sr's, to avoid creating awkwardness between them, and they talked about how it wasn't as fun sometimes, bathing with smaller kids who splashed and aren't capable of the same level of building with foam blocks or drawing with bath crayons or whatever, but they accepted it. They take solo showers about 70% of the time these days, anyway.
Now, though, we have this giant roman tub in the master bath that they've ALL been dying to use, and A and A keep begging me to get in it together, with a "finally! THIS one will work!" air, and there is no "you won't fit" argument. I've laughed it off a couple of times with a "You two are too old to bathe with other people" thing, but they don't get it and reply with things like, "We swim in pools together, what's the difference?" Luckily, so far, they've been asking at inopportune times like when dinner will be ready in 15 minutes or we have to go somewhere soon.
I just hate to crush their innocence...or something...and say "you two are a boy and a girl and your private parts shouldn't be near the other ones' private parts without clothes in between". Obviously I wouldn't phrase it that way, but it is sort of the gist of whatever I do say. I mean they see my bathroom as the prefects' bathroom at Hogwarts - a huge tub and mermaid pictures on the wall - and that is a lot more fun with another kid. Grant put like a tablespoon of shampoo in it last night and turned on the jacuzzi jets, and next thing we knew there were literally TWO FEET of foam and bubbles up on top of the surface of the water in places. Bah.
It's interesting to me that since, in my area, there is very little environmentalism but a whole bunch of poor people, people assume that our earth-conscious choices are "can't afford anything else" choices. For instance someone once tried to give us some money at the grocery store, assuming that a big family walking to the grocery store must be really low on options and without transportation. I've also been offered rides and given a lot of "looks", when we walk. We recently got out the manual reel mower G ordered from Amazon, and two different neighbors came over to offer to let us use their gas powered ones. It's nice of them and I like that we seem to have nice neighbors here, too, but geez.
Incidentally, that reel mower is SO MUCH EASIER TO USE than we feared it might be, and highly effective. G says it's slightly harder to turn, but that is made up for by never having to struggle to start it or have to go get gas for it.
Ananda, Aaron and Isaac have been LOVING VBS all week, and are sad that tomorrow is the last day. It's been a great thing for Jake, Elise and I, too - Monday and Tuesday Grant was off so we took the two of them places, just the four of us, and then yesterday and today I just nursed them and read to them and let them run around while I got things done in the house. G was able to get someone to cover the very end of his shift tomorrow so he can come to their big VBS "show" in the evening. This church is so incredible, the way they go out on a limb for kids and volunteer and plan and just put so much into so many programs. I appreciate it so much, I wish there was a way to express it to them. Aside from writing them big checks with all the hours and supplies in mind :p Really though...I want them to know how much it means to them and how they loved it so much last year and this year and how great AWANA has been for them, and all of it.
I think about my Nana all the time lately. As I vaccum dust off of books and wipe down baseboards, because I've never seen anyone else do those things. As I get the stepladder down to water philodendrons. It is seeming increasingly unacceptable that they moved away and don't seem able to get away much. I mean...they'd be like 2 blocks from us. They could walk over in the evening. We could borrow his hedgeclippers. I swear.
In any case there must be some way to let them know they instilled something in me, all those times I was rolling my eyes at the way they spent their Saturdays.
There is such an incredible, surprising, AMAZING difference in convenience, being in a place that FITS US. The kitchen alone is so time saving - I can make 7 pieces of turkey bacon at a time on the bigger George Foreman. I can toast 4 slices of bread at once with this toaster oven. The stove is so fast that it took me awhile to adjust, but now that I have - WOW. Water is boiling within 2 and a half minutes of being on. Everything just cooks so much faster. The oven preheats so much faster. Meals in general are seriously taking me between half and 3/4 the time they were at the old place.
The dishwasher holds a ton more at once, as well as some items that just plain wouldn't have fit in the old one I was using at all (stock pot? serving plates? no problem). I have less loads in a day. And everything is clean at the end of each one, with nothing needing to go back through.
Same with our "Canyon Capacity" washer and dryer.
The bathrooms stay so clean just because there are two and they're both spacious. Before anything set on our nonexistant counter was knocked off constantly, drips from handwashing ended up in the constantly overflowing garbage that was crammed between the tiny vanity and the toilet, the only way to get behind the toilet to clean was with a rag on hands and knees, etc etc...this is SO MUCH BETTER.
I'm still cleaning and cooking A LOT, but it's so much more efficient and rewarding, now.
Our dining table has more clearance with a leaf in all the time here than it did with no leaves over at the old house. And they will both go in, inside (remember my pics of Thanksgiving Dinner on the back patio, last year?)
I am shamelessly swept away with the Jolie-Pitts' new babies. Rich, beautiful A-List celebrities proudly flaunting a blended family of 6 small kids, telling People magazine all about tandem nursing, and the only childcare help from his parents who are staying with them. No live-in Nanny, just a super involved Dad. I totally bought that magazine, and feel good about how they are giving every penny of the $14million they got for the pics to charity.
I told Ananda and Aaron a sort of bullet-point rundown of their family history and it turned into this huge homeschool discussion wherein they learned about:
-that big budget movies travel not just an hour like they did with Shaun, for filming, but across oceans to other continents
-Cambodian landmines
-Tibetan monks
-starvation in Ethiopia
-malaria in impoverished nations
-where Vietnam is
-what the United Nations is
-the efforts to rebuild New Orleans post-Katrina (which they knew all about, as Katrina hit us first and we watched the news as it intensified and struck again...)
-that "chateau" is the french word for "castle"
-How crappy our society is with our celebrity worship (they had no idea previously, we never buy those magazines or talk about movie stars under non Jolie-Pitt baby circumstances), and how people who wield power (lots and lots of money, people caring about what they have to say and interviewing them on tv) can use that for good things that have nothing to do with Hollywood, if they want to
-etc, etc, etc
Heck yes Maddox is sporting a blue mohawk. I'd like to see someone give them some flack for that, can you imagine - "that poor child would be so much better off back in the orphanage with a decent haircut, what if he needs to get an office job one day..." :p
A weird issue I'm dealing with:
Ananda and Aaron were born 13 months apart and have been joined at the hip ever since. They're going to be sharing a room here, for a couple of more years before that is too weird, and they've historically taken baths together from infancy...until about a year ago. It started seeming like an issue to me, then, as she started acting hormonal and he started yanking up the covers when I'd come in the room to tuck him in at night. Now she's in a training bra and he's had a big old crush on a girl. But they're only 7 and 8. I had just said they were too physically big to bathe together anymore in that little tub at Grant Sr's, to avoid creating awkwardness between them, and they talked about how it wasn't as fun sometimes, bathing with smaller kids who splashed and aren't capable of the same level of building with foam blocks or drawing with bath crayons or whatever, but they accepted it. They take solo showers about 70% of the time these days, anyway.
Now, though, we have this giant roman tub in the master bath that they've ALL been dying to use, and A and A keep begging me to get in it together, with a "finally! THIS one will work!" air, and there is no "you won't fit" argument. I've laughed it off a couple of times with a "You two are too old to bathe with other people" thing, but they don't get it and reply with things like, "We swim in pools together, what's the difference?" Luckily, so far, they've been asking at inopportune times like when dinner will be ready in 15 minutes or we have to go somewhere soon.
I just hate to crush their innocence...or something...and say "you two are a boy and a girl and your private parts shouldn't be near the other ones' private parts without clothes in between". Obviously I wouldn't phrase it that way, but it is sort of the gist of whatever I do say. I mean they see my bathroom as the prefects' bathroom at Hogwarts - a huge tub and mermaid pictures on the wall - and that is a lot more fun with another kid. Grant put like a tablespoon of shampoo in it last night and turned on the jacuzzi jets, and next thing we knew there were literally TWO FEET of foam and bubbles up on top of the surface of the water in places. Bah.
It's interesting to me that since, in my area, there is very little environmentalism but a whole bunch of poor people, people assume that our earth-conscious choices are "can't afford anything else" choices. For instance someone once tried to give us some money at the grocery store, assuming that a big family walking to the grocery store must be really low on options and without transportation. I've also been offered rides and given a lot of "looks", when we walk. We recently got out the manual reel mower G ordered from Amazon, and two different neighbors came over to offer to let us use their gas powered ones. It's nice of them and I like that we seem to have nice neighbors here, too, but geez.
Incidentally, that reel mower is SO MUCH EASIER TO USE than we feared it might be, and highly effective. G says it's slightly harder to turn, but that is made up for by never having to struggle to start it or have to go get gas for it.
Ananda, Aaron and Isaac have been LOVING VBS all week, and are sad that tomorrow is the last day. It's been a great thing for Jake, Elise and I, too - Monday and Tuesday Grant was off so we took the two of them places, just the four of us, and then yesterday and today I just nursed them and read to them and let them run around while I got things done in the house. G was able to get someone to cover the very end of his shift tomorrow so he can come to their big VBS "show" in the evening. This church is so incredible, the way they go out on a limb for kids and volunteer and plan and just put so much into so many programs. I appreciate it so much, I wish there was a way to express it to them. Aside from writing them big checks with all the hours and supplies in mind :p Really though...I want them to know how much it means to them and how they loved it so much last year and this year and how great AWANA has been for them, and all of it.
I think about my Nana all the time lately. As I vaccum dust off of books and wipe down baseboards, because I've never seen anyone else do those things. As I get the stepladder down to water philodendrons. It is seeming increasingly unacceptable that they moved away and don't seem able to get away much. I mean...they'd be like 2 blocks from us. They could walk over in the evening. We could borrow his hedgeclippers. I swear.
In any case there must be some way to let them know they instilled something in me, all those times I was rolling my eyes at the way they spent their Saturdays.
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no subject
Date: 2008-08-08 04:06 am (UTC)So, maybe Jolie strong armed them or paid them off into silence. Maybe the press really did put them up to the outcry and it's all bogus (it was never even totally confirmed that the woman claiming to be the birth mother was, her grandmother had originally placed her in the orphanage saying the birth mother had died). Either way I can't think walking into an orphanage in Ethiopia and saving a starving baby from death is a bitchy thing to do - this is a horrible thing to say in some ways, but really? If I had been through all that with a baby and raised her as my own in two years, and I had their resources, and knew how it was in Ethiopia, I would not be so quick to hand the kid back, either. I don't think it can be as uncomplicated and victimized as "she didn't want to have her adopted after all, and eventually went back to the orphanage to find her" - I mean to me that sounds like it has some gaping holes in it...but, I have never been to Ethiopia or struggled in those conditions.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-08 05:00 am (UTC)I don't think Jolie strong-armed them, I think she was trapped in a position of already having a stable, healthy family... now what? Give her back? It wouldn't be any different if a local/white mother suddenly came out of the woodwork after a while - how would you feel?
I don't believe taking a child out of their established, healthy home is the right thing to do. But black market children too, are wrong - as are the things that have led to many families seeing it as a necessity.
The grandmother did say those things, but the motivation is unclear. It sounds terrible by our standards, but the offer for a better life and money to save your own is a lot different if you've lived that way... it's also clear that her mother didn't intend on that happening. She initially abandoned her, unable to care, then came back when she could and she was already gone. She was told to forget about her.
A lot worse goes on in a lot of international adoption, too. :-/
I started reading Harlow's Monkey a bit back and the things I've learned about international adoption are awful. I have no judgment for people who do it (I can already see noters jumping on me...) but I won't be doing it myself anymore...
no subject
Date: 2008-08-08 06:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-08 03:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-08 04:54 pm (UTC)I think this is one instance where international adoption worked, where my friend knows she got out of a rough situation as a kid, got to grow up with all kinds of advantages in a loving environment, and then got to reunite with her birth family later and everyone gets along. I just wish it could be so good for every internationally adopted child.