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Aug. 27th, 2007 12:07 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
altarflameGrant is using an old mop handle to play "Over and Under" with all of the kids. Well, Elise is laying on the rug nearby watching and squealing. But the bigger four are playing. He holds it with one end against a wall, at varying heights, and says "Over" and "Under" and they all have to manage to get over it or under it. Sometimes he moves it towards them or away and they have to work with it moving. Or he moves it higher and lower continuously so they have to time their stuff and then go for it. Sometimes he holds it upright and they climb it, or slide down it after stepping off our bench. When Ananda and Aaron were toddlers, he would do this with them for HOURS and they'd love it the whole time. Now we have a half hour or so session every couple of weeks.
I love it when nobody's got anything "turned on". Today A and A and Isaac spent about 15 minutes begging me for tv or computer games like they'd DIE without them, when they came in from a long afternoon jumping in the misters. After they finally gave up, it was no time flat until the three of them had this storage shelf thing turned on it's side, sitting in like it was a boat - they were all wearing helmets and had sacks of "supplies".
Things are good. I made curtains for the dining room and love them. I'm almost done with my first hemp and beads necklace and have started a tote bag for Ananda. My crochet bag is still coming along, too, but I think it'll take forever.
We've had two dinners that I was NUTS about recently - one was shrimp and chicken ettouffe with sweet iced tea. Ananda helped me cook that, and the whole time I explained "the South" to her. "That's where people talk like Paula Dean and cook with too much butter?" haha, yes...and a whole lot more. We talked for the first time about slavery, racism, discrimination. She'd heard of the Civil War and Abraham Lincoln on Reading Rainbow. She's baffled and freaked out that people wouldn't like Levar Burton - or Isobel and Sydney - because their skin is darker. And we talked about African food and French food mingling into Cajun and how Dama was from Kansas so she didn't like iced tea sweet -
Annie: I love Dama.
Aaron: Yeah.
Tina: Me too.
Annie: She's really cool.
Aaron: Especially her kids.
Annie: I had a lot of fun there.
Aaron: Especially Zoe.
Annie: We should go back there.
Aaron: Yeah, I want to see her again.
I don't think he meant "Dama" by "her" ;) Talking about being their made it easy to talk about hospitality and generosity and those other, nicer Southern stereotypes. They had the USA puzzle on the counter so we could define the area.
The other really good dinner was last night. Ananda, Elise and I went to the beauty supply store to get white nail polish, which is a grand idea I've recently been all excited about. Then we went over to Publix for dinner. They have this "Apron Strings" thing with a kiosk that has recipe cards, and a tv with someone cooking the "featured recipes" and a little refrigerated section with all the ingredients you need for all of it. We put it all in the cart and went home - it was this and I HIGHLY reccomend it :D I doubled it all for us, Shaun was over and Grant Sr and Robbie were eating and all. Everybody was nuts about it. I wanted to have it again tonight.
I found THE dining table, btw. Oh man I'm in love with the thing. It's at Bayleaf Peddler, this little store a few blocks from here. Jamie, the PATH babysitter we used to use, is coming over every Friday afternoon to give me a couple of hours with "help". This first Friday I used it to take just Elise, and Laura and Brian came along, and we walked over there and browsed around a lot. I took Grant to see it the next day, and he loves it too. We'll probably have to save up for awhile to get it, at least a month if not two, and then use our old chairs and get new ones one per month after or something. But...wow. I can't wait. It's dark hard wood, seats 8 with one leaf or 10 with both in, and has this whole "rustic" thing going on with dings and dips kind of built into it such that the kids can't make it look like crap. It'll look awesome with the new curtains I made :) I don't know how to describe it, obviously ;)
The only trouble I'm having, raelly, aside from occassional sleepless nights and periodic exasperation with AAAAALL the cleaning, is bouts with my brother...*sigh*. I love him. I'm glad he's here. But he's so much work. Seriously. Emotional work. He has a horrible temper. He doesn't take it out on the kids, ever, but he totally goes out in the yard and beats on something or hits the punching bag on the porch like 5 times a day. This has always been him and he doesn't see the problem with it - "I'm getting it out, not hurting anyone or anyone's stuff." And he's right. But...yeah. Counseling! Come on! I managed to get him to Youth Group at the church where A and A and Isaac are going to Awana, this past Wednesday, and he found it tolerable. They have some punked out kids and a rock band, and take trips to cool places. I so hope he makes some friends his own age.
It seems like I'm always trying to explain to him why, no, me hitting Jake would not get him to listen any better, he'd just be even harder to control and it would be totally inconsistent - all the kids went through a toddler phase of getting into things, and Elise will too, most likely. Or trying to get him to understand why personal hygiene is worthwhile or why he should NOT say this or that around my kids, without making him feel like I'm bossing him around (which does not get good results). There's this nonstop gentle coaxing and convincing to get him to eat healthy foods he's not used to and the constant frustration of us both knowing there's no way at all for me to MAKE him do anything. I want to MAKE him go to counseling, but I have to see if my old, AWESOME free counselor can see him. And if we can arrange the ride, because Nerenberg is up the road now.
I see him loosening up a little bit and being more candid. He also eats fruit regularly now. And he's begun to have a sense of humor about his temper and laugh at himself about it a little, largely due to Grant (though not in the moment that he's angry), and that is a Big Change. Laura and Frank took him to get an ID and the drivers' handbook, and let him practice driving with them. I've seen him pick up the GED study handbook and take it to the office with a pencil several times with no prompting. And he's doing household chores like putting away dishes and taking out garbage and his own laundry and so on, for the first time.
I guess I think we're doing him good, but I want to make sure he doesn't do my kids any harm, even minor, and I really wish I could do him WAY MORE good. I want to undo 17 years in one. And Laura keeps telling me I need to accept that that is not possible, and just do the best I can without stressing myself out.
Elise is almost 4 months old. She's scooting forward more efficiently and laughing more consistently. She's rolling like crazy. She's almost sitting independantly. She's beautiful and amazing and I am in love with her and terrified that some awful thing is still going to befall her or is already, and overwhelmed with gratitude and trying to have faith. She's wearing 6-9 month clothes. And having a growth spurt. Isaac is extremely good with her, probably best out of all the kids. Annie gets bored quickly, Aaron is spastic and silly with her and she doesn't like it, and I can't really trust Jake with her unsupervised (for even a minute). Isaac talks with her and "reads" to her and she loves him. Jake and her get along great when they're both nursing, and hold hands and pop off to smile at each other. But otherwise, he's one possessive little dude and not interested in sharing me.
I'm trying to kickstart my metabolism. Lack of sleep + realizing I haven't eaten all day and starting to glut myself in the evening = FAT TINA. I actually feel mostly ok about myself, mostly because Grant still thinks I'm beautiful and sexy, but horrible about my wardrobe, and I refuse to buy clothes in this size that I am and have plenty I could wear if I just lost a bit. And I would feel BETTER about myself, then. And maybe be less hot here in God's Frying Pan where we live. And more inclined to jump on the trampoline again with the kids.
The End
I love it when nobody's got anything "turned on". Today A and A and Isaac spent about 15 minutes begging me for tv or computer games like they'd DIE without them, when they came in from a long afternoon jumping in the misters. After they finally gave up, it was no time flat until the three of them had this storage shelf thing turned on it's side, sitting in like it was a boat - they were all wearing helmets and had sacks of "supplies".
Things are good. I made curtains for the dining room and love them. I'm almost done with my first hemp and beads necklace and have started a tote bag for Ananda. My crochet bag is still coming along, too, but I think it'll take forever.
We've had two dinners that I was NUTS about recently - one was shrimp and chicken ettouffe with sweet iced tea. Ananda helped me cook that, and the whole time I explained "the South" to her. "That's where people talk like Paula Dean and cook with too much butter?" haha, yes...and a whole lot more. We talked for the first time about slavery, racism, discrimination. She'd heard of the Civil War and Abraham Lincoln on Reading Rainbow. She's baffled and freaked out that people wouldn't like Levar Burton - or Isobel and Sydney - because their skin is darker. And we talked about African food and French food mingling into Cajun and how Dama was from Kansas so she didn't like iced tea sweet -
Annie: I love Dama.
Aaron: Yeah.
Tina: Me too.
Annie: She's really cool.
Aaron: Especially her kids.
Annie: I had a lot of fun there.
Aaron: Especially Zoe.
Annie: We should go back there.
Aaron: Yeah, I want to see her again.
I don't think he meant "Dama" by "her" ;) Talking about being their made it easy to talk about hospitality and generosity and those other, nicer Southern stereotypes. They had the USA puzzle on the counter so we could define the area.
The other really good dinner was last night. Ananda, Elise and I went to the beauty supply store to get white nail polish, which is a grand idea I've recently been all excited about. Then we went over to Publix for dinner. They have this "Apron Strings" thing with a kiosk that has recipe cards, and a tv with someone cooking the "featured recipes" and a little refrigerated section with all the ingredients you need for all of it. We put it all in the cart and went home - it was this and I HIGHLY reccomend it :D I doubled it all for us, Shaun was over and Grant Sr and Robbie were eating and all. Everybody was nuts about it. I wanted to have it again tonight.
I found THE dining table, btw. Oh man I'm in love with the thing. It's at Bayleaf Peddler, this little store a few blocks from here. Jamie, the PATH babysitter we used to use, is coming over every Friday afternoon to give me a couple of hours with "help". This first Friday I used it to take just Elise, and Laura and Brian came along, and we walked over there and browsed around a lot. I took Grant to see it the next day, and he loves it too. We'll probably have to save up for awhile to get it, at least a month if not two, and then use our old chairs and get new ones one per month after or something. But...wow. I can't wait. It's dark hard wood, seats 8 with one leaf or 10 with both in, and has this whole "rustic" thing going on with dings and dips kind of built into it such that the kids can't make it look like crap. It'll look awesome with the new curtains I made :) I don't know how to describe it, obviously ;)
The only trouble I'm having, raelly, aside from occassional sleepless nights and periodic exasperation with AAAAALL the cleaning, is bouts with my brother...*sigh*. I love him. I'm glad he's here. But he's so much work. Seriously. Emotional work. He has a horrible temper. He doesn't take it out on the kids, ever, but he totally goes out in the yard and beats on something or hits the punching bag on the porch like 5 times a day. This has always been him and he doesn't see the problem with it - "I'm getting it out, not hurting anyone or anyone's stuff." And he's right. But...yeah. Counseling! Come on! I managed to get him to Youth Group at the church where A and A and Isaac are going to Awana, this past Wednesday, and he found it tolerable. They have some punked out kids and a rock band, and take trips to cool places. I so hope he makes some friends his own age.
It seems like I'm always trying to explain to him why, no, me hitting Jake would not get him to listen any better, he'd just be even harder to control and it would be totally inconsistent - all the kids went through a toddler phase of getting into things, and Elise will too, most likely. Or trying to get him to understand why personal hygiene is worthwhile or why he should NOT say this or that around my kids, without making him feel like I'm bossing him around (which does not get good results). There's this nonstop gentle coaxing and convincing to get him to eat healthy foods he's not used to and the constant frustration of us both knowing there's no way at all for me to MAKE him do anything. I want to MAKE him go to counseling, but I have to see if my old, AWESOME free counselor can see him. And if we can arrange the ride, because Nerenberg is up the road now.
I see him loosening up a little bit and being more candid. He also eats fruit regularly now. And he's begun to have a sense of humor about his temper and laugh at himself about it a little, largely due to Grant (though not in the moment that he's angry), and that is a Big Change. Laura and Frank took him to get an ID and the drivers' handbook, and let him practice driving with them. I've seen him pick up the GED study handbook and take it to the office with a pencil several times with no prompting. And he's doing household chores like putting away dishes and taking out garbage and his own laundry and so on, for the first time.
I guess I think we're doing him good, but I want to make sure he doesn't do my kids any harm, even minor, and I really wish I could do him WAY MORE good. I want to undo 17 years in one. And Laura keeps telling me I need to accept that that is not possible, and just do the best I can without stressing myself out.
Elise is almost 4 months old. She's scooting forward more efficiently and laughing more consistently. She's rolling like crazy. She's almost sitting independantly. She's beautiful and amazing and I am in love with her and terrified that some awful thing is still going to befall her or is already, and overwhelmed with gratitude and trying to have faith. She's wearing 6-9 month clothes. And having a growth spurt. Isaac is extremely good with her, probably best out of all the kids. Annie gets bored quickly, Aaron is spastic and silly with her and she doesn't like it, and I can't really trust Jake with her unsupervised (for even a minute). Isaac talks with her and "reads" to her and she loves him. Jake and her get along great when they're both nursing, and hold hands and pop off to smile at each other. But otherwise, he's one possessive little dude and not interested in sharing me.
I'm trying to kickstart my metabolism. Lack of sleep + realizing I haven't eaten all day and starting to glut myself in the evening = FAT TINA. I actually feel mostly ok about myself, mostly because Grant still thinks I'm beautiful and sexy, but horrible about my wardrobe, and I refuse to buy clothes in this size that I am and have plenty I could wear if I just lost a bit. And I would feel BETTER about myself, then. And maybe be less hot here in God's Frying Pan where we live. And more inclined to jump on the trampoline again with the kids.
The End
