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Sep. 28th, 2003 12:48 pmi'm pondering the strangeness of in-laws. "new" relatives. like, my mom got married a couple weeks back. and i can handle that, i'm glad she's with a pretty nice guy now, he's someone i can deal with easily on my visits and trust in the house with my little brother and all that. but then she announces to me, a couple days before the ceremony, that brandon and destiny (his kids) are gonna be my new brother and sister! now, what? they're 7 and 8 years old! i have my own kids already! laura is my sister and bob is my brother and it's because we grew up in the same house and share memories of childhood. now i'm an adult and i'm supposed to think of a second grader as my sibling? and i can't judge them as really whiny, sheltered kids...i have to just "love them unconditionally", since, after all, "they're family". i managed at least to treat them civilly and include them in the conversation. sort of. i feel mostly like i'm in cahoots with my brother against them. he needs help - they LIVE with him!
i have not until this very moment considered the idea that todd is now supposed to be some sort of stepfather. that is wild. he's only like 12 years older than me. and has a strong southern accent and a lot of skull tattoos. but he's really nice. he helped me out some when i was breaking up with bobby. with money and with christian counseling. maybe i'll make an effort to treat him as a stepdad.
moving on, though, this whole thing. i love my mother in law. i mean, i really, really love her. i know enough about OTHER mother in laws to know that she is totally awesome, and i'm blessed. but it's still sort of crazy to think of her being a grandmother to my children. to think of her being in the delivery room when i have a baby (people do that!), and so on. i mean, nana was a pretty huge part of my childhood. and i can't just hope robby (who annoys me to no end and i always try to ignore rather than stress about) will just eventually go away. we're going to know him when he's 25! that is wild! i'm going to know the twins when they're teenagers, there's no getting away from it.
so my whole family *structure* is totally altered by these marriages and whatnot. the family i had when i was little and the family i have now are like a ven diagram, overlapping in places but mostly irrelevant to each other. maybe if the original structure had been a little more strong and stable, it wouldn't be that way. who knows. suddenly i find myself a cousin to my x boyfriend and his one-time-irritating little sister. now, she and her mother talk to me about the new baby and how it makes them feel old. craziness!
anyway. yeah.
i have not until this very moment considered the idea that todd is now supposed to be some sort of stepfather. that is wild. he's only like 12 years older than me. and has a strong southern accent and a lot of skull tattoos. but he's really nice. he helped me out some when i was breaking up with bobby. with money and with christian counseling. maybe i'll make an effort to treat him as a stepdad.
moving on, though, this whole thing. i love my mother in law. i mean, i really, really love her. i know enough about OTHER mother in laws to know that she is totally awesome, and i'm blessed. but it's still sort of crazy to think of her being a grandmother to my children. to think of her being in the delivery room when i have a baby (people do that!), and so on. i mean, nana was a pretty huge part of my childhood. and i can't just hope robby (who annoys me to no end and i always try to ignore rather than stress about) will just eventually go away. we're going to know him when he's 25! that is wild! i'm going to know the twins when they're teenagers, there's no getting away from it.
so my whole family *structure* is totally altered by these marriages and whatnot. the family i had when i was little and the family i have now are like a ven diagram, overlapping in places but mostly irrelevant to each other. maybe if the original structure had been a little more strong and stable, it wouldn't be that way. who knows. suddenly i find myself a cousin to my x boyfriend and his one-time-irritating little sister. now, she and her mother talk to me about the new baby and how it makes them feel old. craziness!
anyway. yeah.
